Change

I've changed. I'm not the sweet little girl I used to be. Even though she still lives there, deep down inside. I've become more agressive. I've become more cautious in the people who I trust. I've learned to defend myself.

Physically, I've also changed. I went from being the fat girl to the chubby girl. Now I'm trying to become the fit girl. I know for a fact that that I will never be a size 7. My hair has changed. I iron it daily, even when I get the frizzies, I don't let the curls arise. I've had blue highlights. I loved them dearly. Unfortunately, they were getting hard to keep up with. After much thought, I decided to go back to my wicked ways. Ebony black hair, pale white skin, deep blue eyes and blood stained lips. Three boxes of dye and 60 minutes did the trick.

Welcome back Snow White

The power of color

It's completely amazing how the color black makes people feel. Some feel at home with it. Other fear it. A select few don't care about it.

When I decided to use black as my personal color, it was as a reaction to my peers' tendency of following the bandwagon. I wanted to be different. I wanted to have my own identity.

A couple of years later, black became my signature color in wardrobe and blue in design. I've faced many ignorant comments. I've always managed to conquer the situation.

Sometimes, I just wish people would stop worrying about the less trial stuff, like the color of your clothes and worry more about things that are more important like ethics.

Ignorance is the mother of all sin.

Emotional Breakdown

I think I'm a better sister than girlfriend. I've always tried to be there for my sisters. I don't like seeing them cry nor go through the many different pasages of hell that I have encountered.

I'm the one that they can go cry to. I have to be strong to help them up. Then of course, I never counted on two of them needing me at the same time.

The little ones are the ones in need at this moment. I live with one and the other is a small version of myself. Their situations and my need to help them add stress to my work stress and pressure.

I'm gonna crack very soon.

The multicultural broad expands

In a very twisted way I feel like Angie Jolie at the office. I have my broad of orphans. My oldest son is Rogelio. My area is combined with Mike's area. He has Blanca, Juan and Dario. The actions and reactions are like those of a family. The permissions, the checking in on them, the bad comunication with "dad" and open comunication with "mom". It's very funny.

This week, the newest member of the family arrived. Aracely will report to me and will have to adapt to the team and the way we function.

I just hope she adapts well.

All work and no play

All work and no play make Violetta a cranky girl. So this is the dark CS SAP team. Doesn't make me completely happy, but I enjoy the company. Alas, me carrying out my favorite activity: talking on the phone. Mike pretending to be a civilized human being. Begoña in a cheery mood.

Usually that mood doesn't last much due to our lack of cooperation or intelligence. Of course the latter is false, but we have to pretend.

We look so sweet.

Wish these moments were more frequent

You look so fine

You look so fine

I want to break your heart

And give you mine

You're taking me over

It's so insane

You've got me tethered and chained

I hear your name

And I'm falling over

Garbage/You look so fine

All I can say is that my interest looked completely irresistable today.

The gates of the Jurassic Park proudly recieve. . .

That's evil at my best try. Today is my best friend's birthday. More than a friend, she's the sister that God wisely placed in another household. Words can not describe how fortunate I feel to have Lex as my best friend. She is the only person that knows my reactions just by the sound of my voice. Not to mention the only one I share clothes with. Through her I've learned many things. Thanks to her, I also have a nephew that adores me like if the bond that joins us was really blood.

People show up in your life at the moment when they are needed. Lex showed up at perfect timing. We've seen each other cry, laugh, scream and battle with our biggest fear, our weight.

Thank you Lex for being there with me at all times. For putting up with me. For understanding me. For making me become a cheerful person. For making me see what I don't have the courage to see. For giving me a family that takes me as what I really am.

For being the sister I always wanted to have.

Reality

So, I face my reality with a new attitude. I can now admit that I was my best friend's lover. That I learned from that experience and will move on. I realized that I can't be with my exfiance because he's a liar and only wants to be with me when he's in the mood.

I've found out that in the last few months I've become a better human being. I've tried to remain close to those I love.

I've realized I am proud of who I have become.

Lazy Weekend

Nothing compares to the peace of mind I have when I'm over at Lex's house. The last week was completely hatious. The week ended after a strategically planned 2 day out of the office vacation. I'd say very well planned, Mike and I went to a Customer Service seminar at the ITESM.

Before the course was over, Lex sent me a message. I called back and she told me to go over to her place. Mike dropped me off at Lex's place. We ordered lunch and I hugged my nephew. We ate, watched TV, gossiped and chillaxed a bit.

My nephew thinks I'm a pillow or a recliner, so he tends to lean on me. I simply grab him and hug him. He doesn't mind. He simply lets himself go. He took a couple of pictures with my camera. He's gonna be a great photographer. I love him with all my heart. I just love spending time with my evil little midget.

He'll be #1, until I have one of my own.